Fate, Destiny, or plain bad luck?

Last night i got the chance to really test my skills with a variety of women playing their parts:

Girl 1: Mid 30's, calls/texts me every week, doesn't want me, seems to think she can tell me how to "fix" my life

Girl 2: Girl from the summer, 21, i seem to be of use to her only when the ex isn't around

Girl 3: Girl i one-nighted a month ago. Annoying drunk.

Girl 4: My target. 22, attractive, fun, perfect for me. Has a bf.

I'd met Girl 1 for coffee earlier, she wanted to go out so i thought it would be safe to invite her out, i was meeting Girl 4 later that evening. Girl 2 had bailed on me the night before and i knew she might be out. So i went home, agreed to meet Girl 1 in the local at 8, and Girl 4 at 11.

Girl 1 decides that tonight would be the night to flirt with me, cuddle me. My mission was clear in my head, get Girl 4.

After a few drinks and much one sided flirting, i managed to get to the bar where i was meeting Girl 4. Girl 1 was with me and pretty pissed that i was meeting another girl. Just before Girl 4 turns up, Girl 1 bites me on the neck. I'm pissed. I go to the bar, and not 10 yards away is Girl 3 with her mates. I decide to keep my head down and avoid any confrontation. Girl 4 turns up, i send her to the bar to grab a drink and buy me a few minutes. Girl 1 is also at the bar, further down. Girl 3 is behind me, just inside my eyeline. Then i see Girl 2 storm through the bar, her mate points to me and over she strides. She's happy to see me, smothering kisses on me and hugging me. She wants me to take a photo with her, i oblige. It takes 3 attempts to get a photo she likes. She turns back to her mates, i take my cue, collect Girl 4 (with drink) and take her to a side to chat. Girl 2 sees me chatting to her, walks up and "who's she? (meaning Girl 4)" I introduce them, no explanation, and Girl 2 walks away to watch the band who is playing.

I have a short chat to Girl 4, then take her to meet Girl 1 (it is impolite to leave a girl stranded). Girl 1 is very short with Girl 4 (who is shy anyway). I try to chat to both, putting less attention to Girl 4 but displaying better value. I also chat a bit to other friends who have turned up. Girl 2 sees me again and pulls me to her for more photo's. I give her the photo, then back to Girls 1 & 4. Girl 3 still hasn't spotted me, but is v drunk. Girl 1 tries to give me relationship advice while Girl 4 goes to the bathroom. I tell her i have everything under control. Girl 1 is pissing me off. Girl 4 is loving me. I manage to convince Girl 1 that it's hometime for her and she leaves. Finally i'm alone with Girl 4. Girl 4 asks me if se could live with me. This is a bad sign, this implies friendship. I tell her the only way thats going to happen is if she marries me. She says she will in 1o yrs. I tell her thats too long and we should get married now. We laugh it off.

Girl 4's mates (also my mates) turn up. They are on my side, and things are about to improve for me... i hope. I get them all to sit at the back of the bar, away from distractions and where another group of friends are sat. However, when i go to the bar, guess who spots me...Girl 3. She comes over, and is pawing me like i'm a cheap toy. I manage to distract her by pointing out an argument and leave with my drinks. This is the last time i see Girl 2 or 3. I am left with Girl 4 and all our mates. With 2 groups of mates covering me, i'm free to chat to her, flirt and try to persuade her that i am the man for her. Everyone comments how we look like a fab couple. Life is good. Then "dickhead" turns up. This guy hit on the girls i was with on hallowe'en (Girl 4 was there). He decides Girl 4 is his target, the other girls are able to duck away. I'm having none of it. Every time he chats to her, someone distracts him and i am able to resume attraction. The evening ends when we all pile back to a mates house and Girl 4 and I share a sofa together. I walk her home a few hours later. Nothing happened, she's still with her boyfriend.

It was a good night, i think i made positive strides with Girl 4 and also Girl 2. I have decided that Girl 4 is the only Girl for me. :)

The Rules of Flair

I have a few rules of conduct for playing like Flair:

1. Don't date your mates, barmaids or people you work with.
2. Don't shit where you eat - both literally and in your love life.
3. Don't start what you can't finish.
4. Remember that opportunity comes in all shapes and sizes.

I'll update this as i think of more

What makes a night out fun?

Is it the endless pursuit of pussy? In the opinion of some PUA's i know, kisses & sex are the only measure of a "fun night." To other people, getting so drunk that you can't walk is a sure sign.

To me it's about people. A fun night has a story which begins with "Remember when we..." or "So there we were..." A fun night is when you are surrounded by people who make you laugh, it's a night where time is irrelevant. Most importantly, the fun night is the one you recall when your world falls to pieces.

So no, i didn't get laid this weekend, but i had a very fun weekend with my friends

My Tinkerbell

Ok, so strictly speaking she isn't mine yet. I hope she will be.

Going back to the post "Don't mess with Flair," you will recall i chatted to the friend (Tinkerbell) of the girl i liked (AKA DHG in this story). She was shy but sweet enough and had a boyfriend. Well things have changed somewhat in our friendship.

I saw her again a few weeks later and we had a bit of banter at a pub quiz. It was lovely and we became good friends. Fast forward to hallowe'en and we hung out again. It was this evening that i realised how much fun she was. I have only just seen photos that other people took on that night and it seems the signs were there that we would become close.

So i got her number and we saw each other again (as friends) and, finding myself in Reading a few weeks later, i invited her out. She told me she had to meet her boyfriend later on and i was cool with that. Meeting the guy, i realised that to win her, i had to either intimidate him or attract her. I went for the intimidate, knowing that if he left her or put a foot wrong, it would strengthen my image. I did intimidate him, but sadly it seems that this has served to make him treat her better.

QUICK NOTE: Before anyone thinks bad of me for stealing a taken girl, her boyfriend ignores her for long periods of time, her friends don't like him and neither do i.

So, i saw her again yesterday at DHG's house where we had roast dinner, played poker, drank Cava & wine, played poker and watched DVD's. One word - intoxicating. I must have spent hours flirting with her. It was hard not taking her in my arms. It is now at the point where all i have thought about today is Tinkerbell. DHG knows all about it and is doing what she can from her end. I know it's a matter of time and that all i have to do is bide my time and win her over.

She is great, i haven't felt this way about anyone in a long time...

The playground mentality.

Cast your mind back to being 10 years old. If you were like me, you used to play kiss chase with the girls, played football til your knees were bloody and your face was red, and ate anything with more than 5 E-numbers. The best playground game was "IT."

Now think about how you used to treat the girls you liked. There were conversations of "my mate likes your mate" and you used to put worms in the pocket of the girls you liked. You'd insult them, stick your tongue out at them and ignore them when your mates were around.

Life like that now, and see how girls react to you. Carry old school candy in your pockets and give them out to fun girls. Take the piss out of girls until you frustrate them, then take them aside and tell them the truth, that they rock your world. Play It again with the fun girls you meet.

The 10 yr old you was fun, spontaneous and slightly bizarre. Girls love that in a guy.

Ooh, but don't freak girls out with worms.

Being a good guy

Girls don't want nice guys!
Girls don't want bad boys!

Shocked? The truth is they want a bit of both.

The bad boy plays by his own rules. He doesn't ask for permission. He doesn't do things that he doesn't want to do. He calls a girl when it's convenient to him. He doesn't take crap from anyone. He makes the decisions.

The nice guy is respectful. He is interested in a girl for more than her looks. He will be chivalrous and honest when necessary.

So the good guy must have his own beliefs and morals that he nevers stray from but he accepts the views of others. He talks to girl and builds attraction before displaying it. To a girl, it seems she is earning his approval instead of the opposite. Once earned, he is caring and then sexual. He is honest about whether he wants something serious or a bit of fun.

It is a constantly flipping coin but it works.

Be good, treat women well and have wonderful relationships.

ELEVEN PICK UP EPIPHANIES

1. What you look like doesn't matter. But how you present yourself does.
2. Nobody is judging you. They're too busy worrying about what you think of them. So instead of seeking her approval, give her yours.Then take it away. Then give it to her again. This is called flirting.
3. Women do actually like nice guys. They just don't like weak guys. So you can still be nice. But you must also be confident--in yourself, your opinions, and your worthiness and value in the world. In order for a woman to be with you, she needs to feel safe with you.
4. It's not enough to just be yourself. You must be your best self.
5. There's a thin but important line between being horny and being sexual. A horny man hits on a woman before she's attracted to him. A sexual man waits until she's attracted to him.
6. Just because you're interacting doesn't mean you're attracting. Learn to recognize the difference between politeness and interest.
7. To win the heart of a woman, you often have to be willing to risk losing her.
8. When a girl who you went on a date with in the past and who suddenly disappeared on you calls out of the blue, it generally means one thing - so call back right away before she finds someone else to be with that night.
9. Always call a woman the day after sleeping with her and make her feel good about having let go with you--even if you don't want to see her again or she doesn't want to see you again. Don't ruin her for other guys.
10. Don't look to your friends or family for approval as you learn the game. They may like you just the way you are, but not always for the right reasons. With some "friends," this is because when you start looking better, feeling more confident, and succeeding more than they do, you often end up reminding them of their own inadequacies and lack of growth.
11. Finally, to quote the wisdom of Canadian hockey player Wayne Gretzky, "You miss 100 percent of the shots you never take." So simply by approaching a woman and saying something, no matter how badly you may bumble, you've dramatically increased your odds of being with her.

Oh what a night?!?

Last night, i wasn't sure if i wanted to go out. In the end, i decided to go round a mates, have some dinner, watch some TV (californication, chancer), then head into town. I went to the KC to meet some mates. My DH girl was there so i agreed to meet her later at Snooty. I just had to go to Monty's to meet some workmates quickly...(and so it starts)

In the queue, i was stood in front of a rather drunk girl. She asked me to phone her phone as she couldn't find it. I did, and it was answered by some bloke who didn't seem too happy. I told her i thought her phone had been stolen. She seemed quite upset, apparently her friends had deserted her. I told her she could hang with me. That seemed to cheer her up. We did some dancing, which ended with her trying to remove my face with her tongue! She met my mates, loved some of them, they all feared for my life. By this point, she was acting rather amorous. After announcing she had an empty house and would like me to come over, so i did.

At hers, stuff got funnier. She poured us wine, and proceeded to smash her glass in the garden. I gave her mine, which enabled me to keep my "no drinking alcohol in october" rule :)

To be blunt, the sex was pretty awesome. It started in the kitchen, and the clothing slowly removed itself on the way to the bedroom. And yes, i used my special move. After a few hours, i was drained and she fell asleep. At this point, i was unsure whether to leave or stay the night. I decided a nights sleep would be ok, and she had quite the grip on me, so settled in.

When we both awoke, there was no "Who the hell is this guy in my bed" and we had coffee/chats. She phoned her mum, who was looking after her daughter (3 yrs old) and told her that her phone had been stolen. Turns out it hadn't, she'd got her number wrong, her phone was actually in her bag. The nan & daughter were supposed to be turning up at 10:30, i had plenty of time. They actually turned up at 10:15 :(

This wasn't so much of a problem, just a bit awkward. I had a bit of a play, then left to do my sunday chores. I might see her again. Good times x

Being a nice guy

I always wondered if i am a nice guy or a bad boy. As a younger man, i treated some girls very badly. I've got myself in a few silly scrapes, cheated a bit.

Last night i faced up to the realisation that i am a nice guy. There were 3 girls who were out who i looked after because they had troubles. 1 was having a big fight with her bf and so i walked her home and had a bit of a chat. Girl 2 was being messed about by her fella so i tried to cheer her up. He made her wait 2 hours then never turned up. Girl 3 turned up way too drunk and asked me to look after her.

This girl is one of my favourites, i love her. I try to avoid seeing her because of my feelings. I'm not the right guy for her but i can still try to be a friend. At a couple of points, i could have kissed her. I just get the feeling we're not meant to be anything but mates. She wants to go for dinner on wednesday, what should i do, blog?

Don't mess with flair

Last night i was out with these two girls who spent most of the night bitching about everything. "Bars were either too loud, too small, too quiet". "Guys are bastards." "We don't understand women."

Anyway, after 3 hrs of this, i decided to go meet another female friend. She's cute, funny, sociable...need i go on? Throughout the time we spent together, i bumped into other people, and she had her mates to chat too...including this guy.

He took an instinct dislike to me. He kept staring at me, then would look away and laugh. It soon became apparent that it was because he fancied my mate. Fair play, i kept it cool, let him chat to her while i entertained her mate and hoped if i backed off, he could get his kicks.

Fat chance. I started to fume a bit, so when my mate found herself sitting next to me, i decided to stick it to him. Out came Flair, on socialite mode. I used games; showed her tricks and got her to tell me her deepest darkest secrets. We flirted, took photos, and shared stuff. He was pissed but like i said, don't mess.

Back!

Ok, so life got crap and i ignored my musings on here. Basically my life has been all over the place. Got a girlfriend, cheated on her. Got another girlfriend, she got bored. Since then, been a bit complacent, but i have learnt a new lesson.

Instead of being a people-pleaser, i now do what i want, when i want, how i want. It's an honest eye-opener, most people hate that i'm more arrogant, less willing to please. I regularly tell people to fuck off, and walk away during nights out to find my own fun.

In essence, instead of being all about you, i'm all about me. And i love it. Be a creature of impulse, and beat the habit out of habit