Tribute to Nice Guys

(Found on a Facebook Group)


"This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and bitching about what assholes guys are, while disproving the very point. This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores. This is in honor of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honor of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honor of the guys who respect a girl’s every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style.
This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once they’re at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow don’t end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you.
This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she shouldn’t worry about it. This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree you’d ever orchestrated in GTA3 to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around the floor. This is also for that time she didn’t have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing “serious” between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: “oh, but we’re just friends!” And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because you’re nice like that.
The nice guys don’t often get credit where credit is due. And perhaps more disturbing, the nice guys don’t seem to get laid as often as they should. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I can’t. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative bitches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as “oh, he’s too nice to date” or “he would be a good boyfriend but he’s not for me” or “he already puts up with so much from me, I couldn’t possibly ask him out!” or the most frustrating of all: “no, it would ruin our friendship.” Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I can’t figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (I’m going to sleep with this complete ass now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn’t last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single.
So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know you’re sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming. "

NYE

My traditional NYE involves finding amazing clothes to wear, going through the cleaning ritual to ensure the body is clean, face is shaved and everything is smelling good. This i did this year. Then i go out, get drunk and get a girl. If i don't pull, it's because i am in a relationship. This year, for the first time in 11 yrs, i didn't pull. And i feel great. Know why?

I've devoted 12 years of my life with the intention of becoming good with women (as a whole) in order that, when i meet the woman of my dreams, i have every skill required to present the best me that i can.
I've been told that you know when you meet someone you're meant to be with because everything is easy and everything just flows. I've met that girl, she is the subject of a lot of my posts. In a typically slow fashion, attraction has grown and we have spent the last two nights partying together. She is happy with me displaying physical signs of attraction towards her, the only thing i cant do is kiss her in anything other than a friendly manner. And in response, she can be the same.
On NYE, i got hammered. Not a bit drunk, absolutely out... of... my.. tree! And she spent the whole evening with me, apparently we were inseparable, dancing and drinking together. She said she had to look after me.
Last night i told her i'm thinking of going back to Leeds, she asked me to stay a little longer. She also told me that sometimes she wants to come and hang out with me. I told her she's always welcome and that, if i'm free, i'll see her.

Life is a funny old game, 12 yrs, hundreds of women, thousands of stories, and the girl i want within my grasp. Don't mess up now Flair

Fate, Destiny, or plain bad luck?

Last night i got the chance to really test my skills with a variety of women playing their parts:

Girl 1: Mid 30's, calls/texts me every week, doesn't want me, seems to think she can tell me how to "fix" my life

Girl 2: Girl from the summer, 21, i seem to be of use to her only when the ex isn't around

Girl 3: Girl i one-nighted a month ago. Annoying drunk.

Girl 4: My target. 22, attractive, fun, perfect for me. Has a bf.

I'd met Girl 1 for coffee earlier, she wanted to go out so i thought it would be safe to invite her out, i was meeting Girl 4 later that evening. Girl 2 had bailed on me the night before and i knew she might be out. So i went home, agreed to meet Girl 1 in the local at 8, and Girl 4 at 11.

Girl 1 decides that tonight would be the night to flirt with me, cuddle me. My mission was clear in my head, get Girl 4.

After a few drinks and much one sided flirting, i managed to get to the bar where i was meeting Girl 4. Girl 1 was with me and pretty pissed that i was meeting another girl. Just before Girl 4 turns up, Girl 1 bites me on the neck. I'm pissed. I go to the bar, and not 10 yards away is Girl 3 with her mates. I decide to keep my head down and avoid any confrontation. Girl 4 turns up, i send her to the bar to grab a drink and buy me a few minutes. Girl 1 is also at the bar, further down. Girl 3 is behind me, just inside my eyeline. Then i see Girl 2 storm through the bar, her mate points to me and over she strides. She's happy to see me, smothering kisses on me and hugging me. She wants me to take a photo with her, i oblige. It takes 3 attempts to get a photo she likes. She turns back to her mates, i take my cue, collect Girl 4 (with drink) and take her to a side to chat. Girl 2 sees me chatting to her, walks up and "who's she? (meaning Girl 4)" I introduce them, no explanation, and Girl 2 walks away to watch the band who is playing.

I have a short chat to Girl 4, then take her to meet Girl 1 (it is impolite to leave a girl stranded). Girl 1 is very short with Girl 4 (who is shy anyway). I try to chat to both, putting less attention to Girl 4 but displaying better value. I also chat a bit to other friends who have turned up. Girl 2 sees me again and pulls me to her for more photo's. I give her the photo, then back to Girls 1 & 4. Girl 3 still hasn't spotted me, but is v drunk. Girl 1 tries to give me relationship advice while Girl 4 goes to the bathroom. I tell her i have everything under control. Girl 1 is pissing me off. Girl 4 is loving me. I manage to convince Girl 1 that it's hometime for her and she leaves. Finally i'm alone with Girl 4. Girl 4 asks me if se could live with me. This is a bad sign, this implies friendship. I tell her the only way thats going to happen is if she marries me. She says she will in 1o yrs. I tell her thats too long and we should get married now. We laugh it off.

Girl 4's mates (also my mates) turn up. They are on my side, and things are about to improve for me... i hope. I get them all to sit at the back of the bar, away from distractions and where another group of friends are sat. However, when i go to the bar, guess who spots me...Girl 3. She comes over, and is pawing me like i'm a cheap toy. I manage to distract her by pointing out an argument and leave with my drinks. This is the last time i see Girl 2 or 3. I am left with Girl 4 and all our mates. With 2 groups of mates covering me, i'm free to chat to her, flirt and try to persuade her that i am the man for her. Everyone comments how we look like a fab couple. Life is good. Then "dickhead" turns up. This guy hit on the girls i was with on hallowe'en (Girl 4 was there). He decides Girl 4 is his target, the other girls are able to duck away. I'm having none of it. Every time he chats to her, someone distracts him and i am able to resume attraction. The evening ends when we all pile back to a mates house and Girl 4 and I share a sofa together. I walk her home a few hours later. Nothing happened, she's still with her boyfriend.

It was a good night, i think i made positive strides with Girl 4 and also Girl 2. I have decided that Girl 4 is the only Girl for me. :)

The Rules of Flair

I have a few rules of conduct for playing like Flair:

1. Don't date your mates, barmaids or people you work with.
2. Don't shit where you eat - both literally and in your love life.
3. Don't start what you can't finish.
4. Remember that opportunity comes in all shapes and sizes.

I'll update this as i think of more

What makes a night out fun?

Is it the endless pursuit of pussy? In the opinion of some PUA's i know, kisses & sex are the only measure of a "fun night." To other people, getting so drunk that you can't walk is a sure sign.

To me it's about people. A fun night has a story which begins with "Remember when we..." or "So there we were..." A fun night is when you are surrounded by people who make you laugh, it's a night where time is irrelevant. Most importantly, the fun night is the one you recall when your world falls to pieces.

So no, i didn't get laid this weekend, but i had a very fun weekend with my friends

My Tinkerbell

Ok, so strictly speaking she isn't mine yet. I hope she will be.

Going back to the post "Don't mess with Flair," you will recall i chatted to the friend (Tinkerbell) of the girl i liked (AKA DHG in this story). She was shy but sweet enough and had a boyfriend. Well things have changed somewhat in our friendship.

I saw her again a few weeks later and we had a bit of banter at a pub quiz. It was lovely and we became good friends. Fast forward to hallowe'en and we hung out again. It was this evening that i realised how much fun she was. I have only just seen photos that other people took on that night and it seems the signs were there that we would become close.

So i got her number and we saw each other again (as friends) and, finding myself in Reading a few weeks later, i invited her out. She told me she had to meet her boyfriend later on and i was cool with that. Meeting the guy, i realised that to win her, i had to either intimidate him or attract her. I went for the intimidate, knowing that if he left her or put a foot wrong, it would strengthen my image. I did intimidate him, but sadly it seems that this has served to make him treat her better.

QUICK NOTE: Before anyone thinks bad of me for stealing a taken girl, her boyfriend ignores her for long periods of time, her friends don't like him and neither do i.

So, i saw her again yesterday at DHG's house where we had roast dinner, played poker, drank Cava & wine, played poker and watched DVD's. One word - intoxicating. I must have spent hours flirting with her. It was hard not taking her in my arms. It is now at the point where all i have thought about today is Tinkerbell. DHG knows all about it and is doing what she can from her end. I know it's a matter of time and that all i have to do is bide my time and win her over.

She is great, i haven't felt this way about anyone in a long time...

The playground mentality.

Cast your mind back to being 10 years old. If you were like me, you used to play kiss chase with the girls, played football til your knees were bloody and your face was red, and ate anything with more than 5 E-numbers. The best playground game was "IT."

Now think about how you used to treat the girls you liked. There were conversations of "my mate likes your mate" and you used to put worms in the pocket of the girls you liked. You'd insult them, stick your tongue out at them and ignore them when your mates were around.

Life like that now, and see how girls react to you. Carry old school candy in your pockets and give them out to fun girls. Take the piss out of girls until you frustrate them, then take them aside and tell them the truth, that they rock your world. Play It again with the fun girls you meet.

The 10 yr old you was fun, spontaneous and slightly bizarre. Girls love that in a guy.

Ooh, but don't freak girls out with worms.